What is it about Donald Trump and gold?
Now that the former president has more than half a billion dollars in debts from the judgments against him in two lawsuits, he’s going to have to hit up his beloved Trumpanzees for more more more money.
And then even more.
He already tried the digital trading cards, selling idealized pictures of himself as all sorts of heroes. The cards were $99 each, and I caqn only imagine how the ‘zees felt when they learned that the cards actually existed in cyberspace.
So this time his brain trust (Rudy Giuliani and others?) decided the had to give the ‘zees something that could actually hold in their hands. They settled on maybe the ugliest, tackiest pair of $399 shoes imaginable.
If someone came to me and offered me those shoes and told me they were $399, my response would be simple.
“You’ll have to pay me more than $399 if you want me to wear those shoes.”
The fact is, Trump has always been obsessed with gold. I suppose it’s part of his “see daddy, I’m not a loser” mentality.
His Trump Tower apartment was apparently modeled on Versailles, but I’ve been to Versailles and I’ve never seen anything anywhere in France as tacky as Trump’s apartment.
And don’t forget. The heyday of Versailles was nearly 250 years ago.
One thing you won’t see in the picture is Trump’s solid gold crapper. That’s obviously something very important to Donald. How many times in speeches over the last nine years have you heard him complain about low-flush toilets?
Yeah, a lot.
If there’s one thing I will never understand about the Trumpanzees, it’s how they can possibly love someone who behaves like a complete moron. Leave politics out of its completely. Nearly everything the man says is either self-serving or stupid. His idea of Making America Great Again is about strong showers, good toilets and plenty of KFC and McDonald’s.
Of course, it might be possible people are starting to see through him. Showing off his gold shoes at Sneaker Con Saturday in Philadelphia, Trump was booed off the stage.
It looks like he might have to pay the ‘zees more than $399 to wear the shoes.